Friday, February 10, 2012

7 Deductions from Mein Kampf

The following deductions are based on my understanding of what is written in the book Mein Kampf by Adolf Hitler and should nowhere be considered as an endorsement of the book or its author or his ideas.

1. 
Suppression of feelings and non-gratification of the most concerned feeling in childhood always affect the thought process in the adulthood and starts resulting negatively to the highest level when given the favorable surroundings.

2.
Best way to influence common people is to continuously pour the thoughts in the minds as it gets stored in the unconscious and starts becoming a part of truth.

3.
An orator has more influential power that a writer.

4.
Good and bad are the terms used as psychological tools.

5.
 Out of 50 people, if first 10 candidates openly like or support something than the 11th person is automatically under psychological pressure to like or support the same thing.

6.
Mob is super sensitive.

7. 
Most of the times, attaining power is a major reason to publicly think of welfare of the community.

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Groom No. 6 - SOLD

Guests, please pay attention !
The next one is Groom No. 6.

He is from North,
Tall and smart, caste General,
Father Gazetted Officer in East,
photo at your desk.

5 lacs starting price ...
No hands? That's bad.
He is from English medium,
still no hands?
He is an engineer,
all rite there you are - 8 hands,
he works in a prestigious software company,
20 hands
He earns 50,000 per month, going to be promoted in 3 months,
Oh that's awesome - 42 hands.

I now request the Groom's father to submit Value Added Bid of the Groom.

[Bid Submitted]

All right, the bid is 8 lac,
42 hands raised,

9 lac,
42 hands,

10 lac,
7 hands down, 35 remaining,

11 lac,
10 more hands down, 25 remaining,

12 lac,
5 more down, 20 remaining,

13 lac,
8 down, 12 remaining,

14 lac,
8 more down, 4 remaining,

15 lac,
2 down, 2 remaining,

16 lac
1 down, the remaining wins.

Congratulations sir,
you have just made the best deal for a precious groom,
may your daughter gets all the happiness on the earth.

Groom No. 6 SOLD, Next please......

 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After the grand Marriage:
The girl finds that her precious groom works for a call center of a prestigious software company and earns about 14,000 INR per month and her father-in-law is a UDC in some private company in the east. The house is at rent and the boy is a divorcee.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Past and Present - Trying to Reason

[The following is a conversation between two friends who talking about whether to boast about what India has given to the world.]


Person A:
I was watching a movie scene on YouTube in which an Indian hero makes the Londoners aware of what India has given to this world and what world owes to us. I was very glad after discovering the Indian contribution. Its awesome.

Person B:
I have seen that too. The work that was mentioned by hero centered around most of the works done in the past and he is correct about it. The Indian contribution is, no doubt, great but how long are we going to boast about this past glory? Every time somebody calls us snake charmer, we rise screaming saying that we invented zero and told you how to count so just go burn in hell but we forget that this lovely zero and that numeral system was invented almost 1500 years and 2000 years ago, respectively.

Person A:
Are you not happy to feel that we contributed something without which the world would have been in its primitive age only?

Person B:
I am happy but the question is what is our contribution in today's scenario that we can feel proud about? Well there are Indian scientists and doctors working all over the world but there number is a very small percentage of what we call as the largest democracy in the world. We are poor right now.

Person A:
How come we are poor? Don't you know we have Indian Billionaires in top 10 list around the world?

Person B:
We might feel overwhelmed about a handful of businessmen who are in the list of top 10 billionaires but their companies are nowhere near the top 10 all around the world and even if we want to take pride about the billionaires, then we must be proud of boasting about a population equivalent to that of total USA that is living below poverty line. The real world is not constituted of intellectuals or billionaires but the masses who are the lifeline of any place. Their lifestyle, their thinking, their way of reasoning reflects the greatness which comes into the action. Why don't you face the ground reality. What is our collective concrete contribution to the world right now?

Person A:
My dear, we are the maestro of IT. Our BPO's are the best in the world.

Person B:
Well, we are not the maestro of IT, we are the slaves of IT. What we have provided is the clerical standard in the name of executive to the BPO industry. I am not saying that this work is bad. Work is work but the only thing I am saying is that this not something that we should be very much be proud of. Get a BPO job and find it by yourself what is worth boasting about and you will find nothing.

Person A:
We rule the software world.Our engineers are taking our country to new heights. Don't you know about the top software making companies in India?

Person B:
That is another misconception. What I have seen is that even though there are software engineers getting what they deserve but the condition of a considerable number of software engineers is worse than NREGA laborers. In Jaipur or Noida or Gurgaon, there are lots and lots of software engineers getting 6000 INR per month ($120) and the security guard of the same company is getting 7500 INR per month ($150) so just don't tell me that condition of software engineers is good. Adding to that, Indian engineers are one of the most underpaid ones on earth, getting 1/4th of what they should be getting and this ratio is prevalent in most of the IT companies of India. The work hours are 8.5 hours but unofficially they have to work for 12 hours. The HR practices are confined to diplomatic answers and shortlisting candidates for Bell curve. The cream always gets the best but those who are not the cream aren't given even the glimpse of what it feels to be an IT servant.

Person A:
Our country is progressing. We will reach the international standard soon but you don't have to be this cynical about our own people.

Person B:
I am not cynical. I am just showing the correct reflection of what is truth. I know our country is progressing and it will take time to reach the international standards but there is a difference in discussing something and boasting falsely about something. If you think that I am lying then go and talk to the software engineers off the record and then you will find out how it feels to be the most underpaid and over exploited people of modern era.

Person A:
I am sure you are lying and I will prove it after I talk to them but lets talk about our other contributions in modern era. We are the pioneers of yoga and spirituality for which the world still owes us.

Person B:
Ah, my pleasure. I think that we owe the world to remind us that there was something existed like yoga in India a long time ago because we had almost buried it somewhere in Ganges and those foreigners came and found it. We almost forgot that we have the Vedas and the Upanishads to let people know what is the eternal truth as we started living in dreamland of disillusionment and false practices of some powerful people and majority is still living under those rules. The discrepancies at their best.


Person A: 
Dude, spirituality is spirituality. What's wrong in worshiping gods? Enlighten me what discrepancies are you talking about?

Person B:
The Upanishads say that there was nothing in the beginning of the universe except "Nirgun Chetan Tatva" which means shapeless conscious element that has no parameters. This element is the originating point of consciousness that randomly started the happenings to let happen. This is something very different from what is taught to a newborn child in India. Here, we are taught that man made gods have created the universe and the mass media also keep people alluded to the same thing. The Upanishads say that the god of all gods (Devo ke dev) is "Praan" (the breath of life) but I don't think I should remind you of what we are fed with as an answer to who is the god of all gods. We ourselves don't try to look into the mirror and just fall for the self-glory statements without giving any ample thought on why we are emotionally forced to believe the other things. We are told that if we do not bow down to a particular god then we will be punished severely by it and there are movies on it and you know about it. Ironically, people watch those movies with their hand joined in respect for that god but do not pay attention to the reality that even the Vedas talked about agnosticism in Nasadiya Sukta in the Rigveda. Well, this is not respect, this is blind following and nothing else and we call ourselves as the masters of spirituality.

Person A:
Bro,Which Upanishad says that god of all gods is 'Praan'?

Person B:
Prashnopnishad, question no.2.

Person A:
I will check your arguments. But talking further, you don't have anything against our family and social system. The world respects our social system.

Person B:
Alas, our families are big not because we love them but because we needed them to work in our farms. More hands, more work, more earning and this is why we are the proud owner of 16.4 % of the total world population residing in 2.3 % of total land area. Regarding the social system, I think we have created a 'self proclaimed glorious well' in which we are continuously throwing ourselves for sake of an endless chain of false order. How come can anybody decide what a person should be doing right from its birth? Caste prejudice is the most debated issue and I find it amusing that we still find it hard to eradicate it but we don't forget to boast about.

Person A: 
Forget that. Nobody in the world respects the women more than an Indian. Thats how our family and social values are respected.

Person B:
Why do you always like to fall for the traps by giving such statements. I think I do not have to tell you about the extent of female infanticide in our country. Also, I think you should read some of our old controversial Scriptures and some Niti Shastras to get a knowledge of what dual standards we take pride in talking about. Some talk about the heaven in the feet of mother and some talk about something else.

Person A:
You are total package for being a completely cynical human who don't see anything positive.

Person B:
Bravo my dear headless chicken. I just want to say that its good to feel proud about what we have done in the past but the present glory is not up-to our own standards. The real us is still hiding somewhere deep in our unconscious minds but we don't do efforts to bring it out. I, myself, am not woken up completely but starting to reason is starting to develop. At last, I would like to say that its the masses who reflect the society, the intellectuals influence them. We have to go a long way. Talk to you later. Good bye.

Person A: 
Good bye.

Saturday, February 4, 2012

The God Paper

Didn't you hear that?
How many times I have to tell you?
This cannot be done.

But why can’t it be done?
It has nothing wrong in it.

Don’t you understand plain English?
Go talk to someone else.

Talk to whom?

I don’t know.

This is your duty to serve us.
You are paid to do that.
If you don’t do the right thing,
Then I will escalate it.

Go ahead. Try your best.
You cannot beat the jerks and clerks.

[Matter escalated]

What is the problem, son?

They are not doing their work.

Take judicial help.

That is unjust. It will waste my time
And I will lose everything.

I tried suspending them; it’s a heavenly treat for them.
Instead of screaming
Ask you parents why they gave you birth.
That might suffice your queries.
OR
Ask yourself why they are not doing your work
And analyze it.

Do I have to bribe them?

Bribing is evil. We must stop it at any cost.

Then what should I do?

Analyze your certificates.

They are perfect.

No. Maybe some papers are missing.

What papers?

The God Paper.

What  is that?

An Eternal credential.
That creates God.
That locates it.
That feeds it.
That is divine.
That is absolute.
That is everywhere.
That is limitless.
That is the reason for smiles.
That is reason of sorrow and pain.
That is the reason of existence.
That will relieve you from all pain.
That will give you your brain a rest.
Its not just a paper,
It can cut Rocks.
It can melt ice in seconds.
Its a fruit of all seasons.
It paves way the way for love.
It diminishes hatred from hearts.
The strongest force of all.
The passport of our life.
The  license to our soul.
The God paper.

[The work is done after understanding the depth of God Paper (Naive call it currency). It’s really divine.]